Flutterby™! : ironic diamonds

There have been diamond ads up in the Muni/BART stations for a few months which say things like: "Reduce the entire English language to three syllables: 'I Love You'", "Just add 'King Daddy Studmuffin' to your existing pet name". I've been casually thinking it'd be fun to go all Billboard Liberation Front on them, making reference to funding civil wars and all of the other evils that the "The Diamond Trading Company"/DeBeers monopoly have caused, the false value and lack of resale market: "Just add 'Genocidal Colonialist Oppressor' to your existing pet name", "Reduce the Entire English language to three syllables: 'What a Dupe'", and so forth. Then up comes "Whack! Pow! Woosh! Kablam! In a tender loving sort of way", and I realize that irony is completely dead.