Quick Comments and One Liners

"the best answer when anybody asks you if you're any good with explosives is to hold up two open hands and simply say 'Ten'." --Anthony DeBoer

Think Dissillusioned:

http://www.zdnet.com/zdnn/content/zdnn/0428/311073.html

The words "Think Dissilusioned" replaced the "Think Different" on an Apple Computer billboard featuring the Dalai Lama.

Important - we need your vote!

I don't know where this came from, but I'm all for screwing with People magazine's ever-wrong Top 50. It only takes a second! If you've got five seconds to spare, go the following url: http://www.pathfinder.com/people/50most/1998/vote/index.html and vote for: Hank the Angry, Drunken Dwarf

There's now a check box at the very bottom of the list for him.

The San Jose Mercury News reports that the live chat between Koko the Gorilla and 20,000 humans on AOL was disappointing. I'm not really surprised, I think that they were communicating on different intellectual levels. Koko is reputed to have an IQ of 86, which has to be at least twice that of your average AOL subscriber.

Monday, which means a new Helen, Sweetheart of the Internet and My Word's Worth

Yay! Marylaine's got a column on Fox News , go to the "views" then "Guest Columnist" links, it's called "Observing US". I'll try to figure my way through the frames and give a real URL in a bit!

Good Vibrations has a new Pat Califia column, updates on last month's sex news.

Those who are willing to trade liberty for security deserve neither.

And now we're trainging them young to do that. From the article on CNN about Belen High School in New Mexico:

Students who initially chafed at the extra security measures now say they feel safer.

Okay, I'll go clean out my underwear now. I don't feel safer.

Susie Bright has a new column in Salon Magazine , more musings about teaching sex in college.

And there's a new Need To Know out:

   "Koko the gorilla will answer questions Monday on America
       Online. Her tutor, Francine Patterson, will translate
                      questions between AOL users and Koko."
                                         - AOL press release
                            I just had cybersex with a WHAT?
                                                 (asks Koko)

Umm, the "real" technorealism site is at http://www.technorealism.org not http://www.technorealism.com as reported yesterday. I wouldn't worry about it too much, though, it's hard to tell the parodies from the real ones.

A new Net Future .

Good Vibrations has a new Queen On-Line , Carol Queen talks about the International Bisexual Congress.

A new Rumor Mill , with this take on Apple dropping the Dalai Lama from the Asian market "Think Different" campaign: Understandable, but what's next? No Rosa Parks ads in the Deep South?

It's Monday, that means a new My Word's Worth from Marylaine. This week it's book suggestions for National Library Week.

And tomorrow she has a column starting in Fox News Online called Observing US. Watch for it.

Jesus of the week: Jesus does a bong

We've seen the Darwin awards float around, with the occasional disqualified entrant who survived and therefore didn't remove themselves from the gene pool. I propose another set of awards, say, "The Predestination Awards", for people who are obviously cheating evolution.

From the Marin IJ this morning, I propose the first entrant. Note especially the third paragraph:

MARATHON, Fla. -- A 3 foot nurse shark chomped down on a boy's chest and hung on all the way to the emergency room after the teenager tugged on its tail.
Doctors split the shark's spine to unlock its jaw. The boy, Kevin Morrison, 16, of Rockford, Ill., was released from the hospital the same day.
The boy was on a diving trip off the Florida Keys Thursday wehn he saw a shark nearby. He pulled its tail, and the shark whipped around and bit him, the Coast Guard said.

http://www.news.com/News/Item/0,4,21223,00.html?st.ne.1.head

MCI legal department harasses Internet performance site for reporting the truth. Anyone who doubts 14-21% packet loss on MCI networks need only do a traceroute occasionally.

This isn't the first case of a company with bad service trying to cover up their problems via their legal department, but we'll be seeing far more of this in the future.

While I'm going off on boondoggles, I'd also like to point out that FCC Chairman Bill Kennard would like inner city schools to spend more of their resources on technology with limited practical value that will be obsolete in several years .

If one were paranoid one could quickly come to the conclusion that there's general collusion to keep tech stocks with no intrinsic value high. Not that I'm cynical or anything.

San Jose Mercury News reports that 1 in 10 Ca. teachers lacks credentials .

No kidding? If you've been paying attention, that's because the unions got a stranglehold on the California educational system and made the cost of entry too darned high. There's only so much post-graduate hoop-jumping a teacher will do before deciding that the rewards of teaching kids are not worth the bureaucratic hogwash and low pay.

I'll bet many of these teachers are certified in other, higher ranked states.

Any hot startups looking for a good coder outside of California, preferably in a mountain state somewhere? There are parts of this culture I like, but being subject to the whims and capricion of such a badly mismanaged government is beginning to wear.

There's a new Need To Know , leading off with this quote:

>       "NT 5.0 will build on a proven system architecture and
>         incorporate tens of thousands of bug fixes from 4.0"
>                 - MICROSOFT on the not-quite-imminent new NT
>  while NT 6.0 will have *hundreds* of thousands of bug fixes!

There's a new Rumor Mill out. Nothing cosmic today, the expected report on Kawasaki and Andreesen defecating like pachyderms. If you haven't seen that story, you are out of touch.

Commerce Department secretary William Daley has finally seen the light and realized that US crypto export laws are, at best, counterproductive.

Not that one person with a clue has ever managed to change the course of government. Heck, even several thousand with a clue have generally only succeeded in slowing the inevitable decline, but it warms the heart.

http://www.news.com/News/Item/0,4,21120,00.html?st.ne.1.gif.2

Salon Magazine's Media Circus today is hilarious.

http://www.news.com/News/Item/0%2C4%2C20978%2C00.html

Microsoft admits that NT isn't scalable: "This is pretty limited. One or two NT servers isn't enough to run an ISP on." says Microsoft group product manager Bill Koszewski.

Anyone care to tell 'im what you could do with one or two Linux boxes?

Happy day before taxes day. And remember, the next time someone proposes that "the program only costs $.68 per American" that's probably $6.80 to you and just shy of a nickel and two pennies to them.

A new Rumor Mill on News.com. Yet more musings on the recent spate of net kiss-n-tell books.

Salon Magazine 's feature today is some musings on the nature of fathers . Really good, I'll put the archival address in tomorrow.

It's Monday, with a new Helen, Sweetheart of the Internet release, and a new My Word's Worth , musings on the privacy of our public figures.

INTERNATIONAL TV-TURNOFF WEEK APRIL 22 - 28

If you would like more information for your family or school contact TV-Free America. They can provide a 24-page organizer's kit which includes sample press releases, answers to questions, latest stats on tv-watching and children, a great biblio., sample certificates and tv-turnoff pledges. $l0 covers costs-it's worth it! OR - just turn off your tv for the week and send them a postcard:

TV-Free America
1611 Connecticut Ave, NW #3A
Wash D.C. 20009

http://www.essential.orga/orgs/tvfa

Reuters reports Museum of Sex has been planned for New York City.

A California court has ruled that minors don't have a constitutional right to sex . I believe that motion detectors are soon to be installed on beds to ferret out those unconstitutional masturbators.

A new Need To Know

Salon has a new Susie Bright column.

If someone you know goes to the Stanford Graduate School of Business, do something nice for them because they've just gone through a horrible disaster. In fact I vote we all offer them honorary sympathy PhDs, just refer to anyone who lost data in this crash as "Doctor".

And for those of you who don't, take this as a warning to back things up, and even if you think you've got a DP department, back things up yourself anyway.

From: http://www.sjmercury.com/business/center/stanford09.htm

The Stanford Graduate School of Business, justly known as an incubator of high-tech growth, has been struggling for the last month to recover from what its dean calls a ''disaster'' -- a computer snafu that in some cases erased years of academic work.
Among the files lost, Stanford officials said, were databases that took months to build, notes of crucial research, and parts of dissertations and books that had been developed over years.

[snip]

And many of the faculty and students were shielded from disaster because they used Apple computers or Unix mainframes -- rather than the Windows-based PC's served by the business school network.

[snip]

``I want to say that they did not crash in the sense of just stop working,'' Spence explained. ``They were taken down for capacity additions to the drives, and for reasons we still have to get to the bottom of, they did not recognize the contents of the original drives.''

[snip]

New Rumor Mill , Skinny takes on Apple's performance.

Krishna meets Disney >From the BBC:

The Indian Prime Minister Atal Behari Vajpayee is opening a new multi-million dollar high-tech temple built by the Hare Krishna movement.
The Glory of India temple in New Delhi combines ancient teachings with nine "mechanical gods", built by a special effects company.
The robots, created by Los Angeles-based Attraction Services, will recite from Hindu scriptures like the Bhagwad Gita and the Vedas.
Hollywood and Indian actors provide the voices for the "gods", which can move their heads, and limbs.

I see a market here... Do you think Chattanooga could do with an animatronic stations of the cross? Jesus writhing as the soldiers pound in the nails? (repeated every 20 minutes?)

It should also be noted that the wax handle-bar moustache on at least one of these gods looks like there might be a little bit of culture borrowing going on, so there should be no problems with making Jesus white.

I hadn't checked Good Vibrations in a while, Pat Califia has a new Quickies column, reporting on everything from women fighting the Taliban in Afghanistan to the latest in medical technology, and Carol Queen talks about Boogie Nights

Once again, it's Monday, and that means a new My Word's Worth , the conclusion to last week's two parter.


CC'd all over the place.

So Ken Starr has subpoenaed the records of Kramerbooks and Barnes & Noble, allegedly in an effort to find out of Monica Lewinsky bought a copy of "Vox", with the supposition that that book then got sent to the president as a flirtation.

You see where this is leading, don't you?

Are there enough people out there who might be interested in forwarding the special prosecutor a copy of Nicholson Baker's finest that we could make an impact?

Just asking.

It won't do any good to send one in isolation, so if I get messages at bookstostarr@flutterby.com from 10 people saying yes I'll package up a copy and ship it off, and send a message back with the appropriate address in it. Last I checked the book is $7 in paper, so this is a commitment of $10 and your time, don't taunt me if you aren't serious about it.

Or maybe it's a stupid idea, but the offer stands.


A new Need to Know is out.

Skinny DuBaud chronicles the short life and inevitable death of that latest attempt of snide New Yorkers to ram their tired old pragmatic nihilism down our throats, technorealism . Doncha just love the losers who come along after the house is built and complain that you didn't put their easy chair in the living room for them?

>From News.com: Gene Carter of the U.S. District in Portland, Maine has overturned the portion of the 1996 act which made simulated child pornography illegal. I'll be hoisting a beer for that this evening, telling us what we can and can't simulate is dangerously close to the Thought Police.

Another one bites the dust: The only reason in our household to watch television, Nothing Sacred, has apparently been canceled. I wonder if there's any point to having that TV clutter up the living room any more...

>From a report at News.com:

"Junkies of Internet are junkies of media in general, especially television," said Rimer. "TV users are typically more likely to use the Internet in very large amounts. We believe there is a correlation between heavy TV users and heavy Internet users. As the Internet matures and more bandwidth becomes available, the correlation will increase, because the experience on the Internet will not only more additive to television, but it will also be a more immersive."

All those beautiful dreams we had about building a global community? It's over. Go back to your lives, citizens, 'cause we're in for another wave of lame L.A. inspired trash, delivered faster.

Oh well, it had so much promise while it lasted...


Archives of neat sites posted to Flutterby , notes to webmaster@flutterby.com