Flutterby™! : no, dear

Next unread comment / Catchup all unread comments User Account Info | Logout | XML/Pilot/etc versions | Long version (with comments) | Weblog archives | Site Map | | Browse Topics

no, dear

2013-12-18 18:46:31.04383+00 by Dan Lyke 1 comments

Happy marriage study abandoned as husband becomes depressed:

Researchers at the University of Aukland in New Zealand were hoping to test whether the key to a happy marriage lies in bowing to the whims of a partner and giving up the need to ‘always be in the right.’

[ related topics: Invention and Design Sociology Current Events Education Marriage ]

Inbound links

comments in ascending chronological order (reverse):

#Comment Re: made: 2013-12-18 19:38:49.492262+00 by: meuon [edit history]

Nancy and I could/should write a book about this. Yes, there is compromise in a "happy" marriage. This is also strength in agreeing that you don't agree or like something, and loving the other person as they are. Marriage is not "candy coated glossy perfection". But with some mutual respect, trust, tolerance, understanding, love (and a little lust), it can be "happy".

Defining "happy" as 1 person subservient to the other, is not real happiness. It even only works for BDSM-ish couples if the "Master" is worthy of the Sub's subservience. Being "in charge" is a responsibility as well as a privilege, you have to constantly earn it and be worthy. It can't be forced, and when it is, bad things happen.

Marriage is one of the most important and complicated things humans do. We tend to do it young, with bad examples and bad information and hormones raging. Everyone expects you to get it right, for the rest of your evolving life.