Flutterby™! : Khajuraho

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2004-03-11 19:57:48.060754+00 by Dan Lyke 7 comments

For me it's a relatively slow day today. I've built up a new test machine, offered some suggestions for some training materials, but mostly I'm on eggshells waiting for stuff to break so I can dive in and fix it. All of which is my excuse for...

Well, okay, that's not strictly true. Todd also forwarded me a job opening for an IS manager over at Good Vibrations, and after some hemming and hawing back and forth encouraged me to apply. I think I'm quite a longshot for the position, information systems management would be a bit of a stretch for me, but it could also be really fun and rewarding. So last night I wrote the "this will either show them that I'm the perfect fit, or get my resume roundfiled posthaste" intro letter, and today I was reminded to go poke around the site for a bit, see what they're up to online. All of which takes me further from:

Someday I'll formalize my thoughts enough and protect the privacy of those involved in such a way that I can write up an explanation of why I'm no longer interested in exploring the spiritual aspects of sex with the neo-Tantra movement. And yes, Eric, it has a little to do with your "care bear" comment, but not nearly as much as you'd think.

At any rate, over at Good Vibrations Magazine (this is the noughties, baby, what is with those funky-ass URLs?) Arlo Tolesco takes on "sacred sexuality" in the context of a visit to The Erotic Temples of Khajuraho. Every other travelogue I've read about India makes me not want to go there, this one makes me ready to endure every downside I've heard of.

[ related topics: Religion Good Vibrations Erotic Sexual Culture Dan's Life Todd Gemmell Coyote Grits Sociology California Culture ]

comments in ascending chronological order (reverse):

#Comment Good Vibes made: 2004-03-11 23:09:42.034784+00 by: whump

I'd put in that cover letter that you'd be able to fix those nasty URLs in their CMS.

#Comment Re: The Erotic Temples of Khajuraho made: 2004-03-12 01:22:41.46801+00 by: polly

hmmm...she is held in the air by her maidservants while he is standing on his head "servicing" her. if you look at it long enough, you realize that if he would just lay down on the floor, THEN she could straddle him backwards while he played/slapped her ass...or play with whatever he could reach! sometimes the sex act requires too much thought and becomes controlled/stifled...just let it go along with the flow...what ever feels good. i think i need a cold shower :(

#Comment Re: made: 2004-03-12 22:30:26.10614+00 by: meuon

neo-Tantric: I have a friend that teaches 'sacred sexuality' classes in Chattanooga, not something that reaches widespread appeal here. In talks with her, and some reading about it: it's far too mystical for me on one level, and too clinical at the other. Still I find that people either 'connect' or don't. Sex can be good, even without a connection, but it's not the same. Right now I'm experiencing a mutual connection relationship. Even when we are not having sex, there is a connection, feedback, communication.. on deeper levels. It works. During sex, it's insane.

Dan, I can see why you'd distance yourself from the neo-Tantra movement, but do you (and Charlene) experience that connection? Is there still a deeper side of sex to you and your sexual relationship than the pure physical fun and release?

Polly, you need a cold shower.. and a deserving man.

#Comment Re: made: 2004-03-14 04:16:05.199286+00 by: TheSHAD0W

> Todd also forwarded me a job opening for an IS manager over at Good > Vibrations, and after some hemming and hawing

And humming?

> back and forth encouraged me to apply...

Sorry, couldn't resist. :-)~

#Comment Re: sacred sex -v- toys/lotions/potions made: 2004-03-14 14:20:57.401733+00 by: polly

i looked up "neo-tantric" to see what THAT was about, very interesting reading, but as meuon says "too clinical". on the mystical side of it, sounds like a form of yoga. the breathing exercises had relevance that i'm going to incorporate into my regime of exercise and maybe some self exploration, but still need to have a partner for the rest of it.

THEN i went to a "pure romance" sex toys/lotions & potions party with a bunch of horney women. my secretary from school had a couple of us from school and several of her friends over for the party. the two of us from school were the only white women there...which was fine. i teach in an all black inner city school, i LOVE my job, but i digress. these women came to the party ready to rock and roll. we tried out every lotion & potion guaranteed to make your man putty in your hands and willing to agree with anything you say or do! the representative showed us this lotion that would make him climax quickly and another one that would make him stay hard for a long time without climaxing. she said she uses both at the same time. talk about manipulating and controlling! lol she told us about pheromones that "will awaken all your senses, enhance moods, increase sexual desires, enhance sexual moments, elevate confidence, your own private mating-call". i wore that to the contra dance last night. i couldn't tell a difference in anyone but i did have a lot of fun...well, i digress again. i do need to tell you about the bunny. i've seen vibrators around for years...never seen a bunny that could do the things it could do! it's held by a band around your fingers and when you hit the button, his little feet and paws start running, and he's the prettiest purple i've ever seen. oh my god...when you hit the high button...yep, i've got to get one of those! in the end, i came out with the pheromones, a bullet (that's fun), and a moisturizing oil that is great for skin that tans in the can <tanning bed>. the other women? one little lady had a "bullet" stuck under her shirt and this wiggly tongue thing attached to her face and was getting an orgasm, three women were squirming from "special intensifiers" that they had placed in strategic areas. i had to pass on that one. yep, sex toys/lotions/potions have come a LONG way from the 70's... NOW, where's a man when you need one?

#Comment Re: made: 2004-03-14 22:53:13.271302+00 by: Dan Lyke

Meuon, my complaints with the portions of the movement aren't at all centered around the sense of connection that ritual and a little spirituality can add to sex. That's all good.

But any time we start to build ritual and invoke the unknowable, often people will start to add rules. And many of those rules are about "wrong". I specifically disagree with the emphasis I've run into in some of the neo-Tantra communities denigrating fantasy.

So there's that (and there's a lot more expansion on that that I could do on the topic of prohibition and small "c" catholicism), and that the phrase "tantra guy" has a specific meaning in most of the other sexual communities, and it ain't positive.

Dang, Polly, I'm gonna have to find one of those bunnies. And I'm playing with ideas for sensors, because I'm pretty convinced that I need to implement my vibrating panties idea.

#Comment Re: the bunnie made: 2004-03-14 23:06:20.345044+00 by: polly

dan, you could call it the "ever-ready" panty!

neo-tantra doesn't encourage fantasy? didn't pick that up while reading about it....got to have the fantasy time...black lacy things that can be ripped off in the heat of the moment or during the heavy petting gone wild time, lol, or...i better quit while i'm still sane.