Flutterby™! :

A random manifesto generator. It gave me this: Friends, we all know that elections are a waste a time. However, we'd rather not lose our deposit again, so please vote for our party.

1. A vote for us is a vote for politics.
2. More tax on road cones - spend the money on sweeter sewers.
3. Let's exchange a harder future.
4. We will exsanguinate chewier Volvo drivers.
5. We will swap carbuncles for roads to improve our liberty.
6. Our strong rivals want more crime.
7. We know that lobotomies can embarrass Parliament. We will have more taxation instead.

I got there from the Tool of Objective Truth, measuring the veracity of any statement. And there because the good folks at http://www.crushmicrosoft.com sent me to the Operating System Sucks-Rules-O-Meter