Flutterby™! : Emeril vs. Cthulhu

I've been looking for a context in which to link to Columbine's rant about Sandra Lee's "cooking" show. I couldn't really bring up much venom for the comments there, because the last time I saw cooking shows was probably the last time I flew JetBlue and tried to escape the evil which was The Food Network staring out from the seat back in front of me. Obviously there are exceptions, but if you want to talk about style over substance...

With that in mind, go read Emeril vs. Cthulhu:

Another cover removed. A single pork chop lay on the platter. Glops of color had been dolloped on the plate in an attempt to decorate it, but instead had the unfortunate effect of looking like Jackson Pollok vomited on the dish. The pork chop itself was relatively benign. Until the devilcook pulled out a single bottle of Essence. A mixture of several spices designed to destroy the natural flavor of anything it touches, Emeril dumped half a bottle on the pork chop. A brief noise could be heard, as if the pork chop itself was rebelling from this, the last indignity.

Narylhotep shook it's headlike appendage again. It was feeling slightly ill. How could this be? Narylhotep fed on souls and the terror of mortals. No normal food, however vile should be able to bother it. But this...